At 12 weeks, I'm not where I'd hoped I'd be....but I'm not sure my expectations were realistic, honestly. I am a perfectionist and tend to be pretty hard on myself, so I'm working on that. I'm realizing what is reality and working to accept that.
I just finished my May 30 day challenge and I lost about 3 pounds. I feel a lot stronger than I did 30 days ago. I'm able to run longer, I have more endurance in my workouts, and my strength is slowly coming back.
While I'm so happy at the progress in the pictures above, my area of struggle is still how I look. I'm having a hard time there. It's tough to look in the mirror and zero in on "problem areas" I feel I have. Satan has really been getting to me in this area and I've had to actively combat it. I'm re-reading Beth Moore's book "So Long Insecurity" which I LOVE and have read twice before. I'm also working on giving myself some grace and remembering I had a baby 12 weeks ago. And I had that baby via major surgery. It takes time....I know that. I'm just very inpatient and putting a lot of pressure on myself to bounce back quicker. I'm working on that.
I'm also nursing Allie. When I nursed Landon, I didn't lose the extra weight until I quit when he was 13 months old. I'm expecting that this time around too, but for some reason, it's harder to accept. I'm not sure why.
I've got to stop comparing myself. I've got to stop idolizing my health and fitness. I've gotten stuck in that trap the last several weeks and I see it and am working on it.
I'm trying to give myself more grace. Realize the reality and adjust accordingly. Enjoy my babies. Enjoy the days. Enjoy the fact that I'm at where I'm at, health wise. Celebrate the fact that I'm able to feed my daughter. So thankful for that.
I'm 12 weeks out and I'm not where I'd hoped I'd be, but I'm accepting that and moving forward. And as I move forward, I'm staying positive, realistic and continuing to take care of myself in a healthy way. I'm also going to stop the negative self talk.
I'll hop back in at the end of my June 30 day challenge and give you another update!